


Please Be Nice On This Feast Of Lights

by arjache



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Theatre, F/F, Hanukkah, Holidays, Humanstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-05-11 09:42:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5622841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arjache/pseuds/arjache
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>TT: It's not like we've rehearsed or anything.<br/>TT: Not that I'm saying we need to kiss right now.<br/>TT: You know, I'm just going to stop talking about this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [redleobox](https://archiveofourown.org/users/redleobox/gifts).



  
\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] \--  
  
TT: I'm nervous.  
GA: Don't Be  
GA: You'll Do Fine  
TT: Are you sure you want me involved in this?  
TT: I'm not actually a theater person. I just do a very good job of playing one.  
GA: That Sounds Rather Like A Theatrical Skill  
TT: I'm a writer, not an actor.  
GA: We Need A Screenplay  
TT: A composition the likes of which I have never written.  
TT: My expertise is more of the fantasy novels, fan fiction, and overly wordy analytical blog posts school.  
GA: So In Other Words  
GA: Blood Love And Rhetoric  
TT: You could put it that way.  
GA: All Necessary Components Of A Theatrical Production  
GA: Also You Already Know Everybody  
GA: And We Are Very Short Staffed Right now  
GA: Which Is Why I Asked For Your Help  
TT: Okay.  
TT: When's the meeting?  
GA: Later Today On Chat  
TT: I'll be there.  
GA: Thank You  


  
\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] opened memo on board What Comes Next --  
  
GA: Good Afternoon Everyone  
GA: We Need To Start Thinking About Our Next Production  
GA: And Before Anyone Asks No We Cannot Just Do A Selection Of Songs From Hamilton  
AG: But...duels!  
GA: There Is To Be No Dueling Under My Watch  
GC: >:[  
GA: The Department Head Has Given Us A Specific Request  
GA: Normally The Choral Society Puts On A Holiday Concert  
GA: But It Has Been Nothing But Chaos Over There Due To The Music Director Position Currently Being Unstaffed  
GA: Pardon The Pun  
GC: YOU 4R3 H3R3BY P4RDON3D  
GA: The Orchestra Was Asked If They Wanted To Put On A Repeat Performance Of Handels Messiah Which You Will Recall They Did Last Year  
GA: However They Declined Due To The Incident Of Which We Will Not Speak Which You Will Also Recall Happened Last Year  
AG: Which totally wasn't my fault!  
GA: The Bell Choir Was Also Planning Their Own Concert But They Went On Tour This Week And Are Now Apparently Stuck In Heathrow For At Least A Month  
GA: All Of This Has Resulted In No Performances Being Scheduled For The Entire Month Of December  
GA: The Other Departments Are Getting Restless For Entertainment  
GA: The Science Department Has Recently Threatened To Create Giant Atomic Monsters To Alleviate Their Boredom  
GA: When Asked How That Was In Keeping With The Holiday Theme They Suggested The Monsters Could Glow Green  
GG: i...may have been involved with this a little :o  
GA: So  
GA: I Think It Is Clear What We Need To Do  
AG: 8ecome an elite team of superheroes and defeat the giant atomic monsters!  
GA: Unfortunately That Is Not Covered By The Budget We Have Been Given  
AG: 8oooooooo  
GA: So We Need To Put On A Holiday Musical  
GC: S3COND3D  
TT: Agreed.  
GG: oh gosh yes!!!  
AA: 0kay  
AG: Fiiiiiiiine, whatever.  
GA: I Would Like This To Be A Reflection Of All Of Us  
GA: The Previous Holiday Programs Have Been Rather Lacking In Representation  
GA: We Are A Diverse Team And We Have The Opportunity To Do Better  
GA: I Have Just One Question  
GA: Does Anyone Here Actually Celebrate Christmas  
GA: Seriously Does Anyone Because I Dont  
TT: ...  
AG: ...  
GC: ...  
AA: ...  
GG: ...  
GG: i mean sort of but i havent in years...  
GG: i was celebrating both it and kwanzaa for a while but these days i guess i mostly just celebrate kwanzaa  
AA: i th0ught you were hawaiian  
GG: there are black people in hawaii!  
GG: and more generally a lot of mixed folks like me  
GG: but yeah i mean, i know christmas, but i wasnt really planning on celebrating it this year  
GA: You May Be The Closest We Have To An Expert Then  
GA: Perhaps We Should Do A Roll Call Of The Various Holidays Important To Us This Time Of Year  
GA: And Consider Incorporating Those Into Our Production  
GA: So We Have Jade For Kwanzaa At Least  
GA: Rose Youre Celebrating Chanukah I Think You Mentioned Right  
TT: Right.  
GC: M3 TOO!  
AA: i plan 0n 0bserving the s0lstice this year  
GA: Excellent  
GA: Vriska Would You Like Us To Do Something About Diwali  
AG: Ugh I dunnoooooooo.  
AG: 8y the time we actually put on the thing it'll 8e, like, over a month past.  
GA: Is There Another Holiday You Would Prefer To Include  
AG: I mean there's Pancha Ganapati 8ut that's mostly a thing that gets played up here because of Christmas...  
TT: Truly, it is the Hanukkah of Hindu holidays.  
GA: Okay Well We Could Do One Or Both Or Neither Just Consider It  
GA: I Think Thats Everyone  
GG: what about you kanaya???  
GA: Oh Right  
TT: Should we include Eid?  
GA: Eid Al Adha Was In September And Has Not Been In December Since 2008  
GA: But Um  
GA: I Suppose We Could Include A Bit About Mawlid  
GG: yay!!!  
GA: Alright  
GA: So Lets Go Over Our Responsibilities Here  
GA: We Are Incredibly Understaffed This Semester And The Only Way This Is Going To Work Is If We Coordinate  
GA: Everyone Will Need To Be Up On Stage As Well As Working Behind The Scenes At Different Times And We Must Approach This As If We Were A Well Oiled Machine  
AG: :::;)  
GA: Thus I Am Assigning The Jobs Of Tactician And Script Writer To Rose  
TT: I am apparently dual wielding this time around.  
GA: Yes Well As Of Right Now We Are All Playing For More Than One Team  
TT: ...  
AG: ........  
GA: Vriska Before You Can Wink At Me Again I Am Assigning You And Aradia Lighting And Rigging Respectively  
AG: Don't forget pyrotechnics.  
GA: There Are No Pyrotechnics For This Performance  
AG: Not with that kind of attitude there won't 8e!  
GA: Moving On  
GA: The Two Of You Will Need To Coordinate With Jade Who Is In Charge Of Set Design  
GG: yay make all the things!!!  
GA: While Rose And I Coordinate On The Score With Terezi Who Will Be Our Sound Engineer As Usual  
GC: 1 H4V3 4 QU3ST1ON  
GA: Yes Go Ahead  
GC: DO3S TH4T M4K3 M3 4 D3CK3R OR 4 B4RD?  
GA: It Makes You A Sound Engineer  
GC: Y3S BUT W3V3 GOT 4 R1GG3R 4ND 4 T4CT1C14N SO 1M NO LONG3R C3RT41N WH1CH RPG W3R3 PL4Y1NG  
AA: whatever it is let us h0pe f0r vriskas sake that youre playing the pacifist r0ute  
GA: We Can Discuss Weapon Assignments At A Later Time  
GC: >;]  
GA: In The Meantime I Think We Have Everything Else Assigned So I Am Going To Adjourn This Meeting Before The Winking Gets Any More Out Of Control  
GG: the winkening :o  
GC: YOU D1DNT W1NK  
GG: *is in special isolated biology lab protected from the winking epidemic*  
GA: I Will Be Following Up With All Of You Individually To Go Over The Details Of Your Tasks  
GA: Good Night  



	2. Chapter 2

  
\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] \--  
  
TT: Okay, let's talk set design.  
GG: i was thinking i would go with a lot of plants!  
GG: just, you know, assorted greenery  
GG: maybe some seasonal stuff?? and some trees and bushes and things? idk  
TT: My stereotypical name and I appreciate your design motif.  
GG: wait, is lalonde a particularly jewish name??  
TT: Not really, but I'm named after a plant, which nets me extra Ashkenazi naming points.  
TT: A lot of German Jewish names end in -baum. It means tree.  
TT: Mandelbaum, almond tree. Appelbaum, apple tree.  
GG: tannenbaum?  
TT: Fir tree!  
TT: See also the Jewish-coded Pines family in Gravity Falls.  
GG: actually i meant like the christmas tree song!  
GG: you know  
GG: o tannenbaum  
TT: Oh.  
TT: You know...  
TT: I wonder if we could riff on that for a song about family names.  
GG: oh family tree, oh family tree...  
TT: How lovely are thy branches?  
TT: Hmm. And then for the next bit, perhaps:  
TT: We persevere / We'll always grow...  
GG: through summer sun and winter snow!  
TT: I like it.  
TT: Especially because it saves me the trouble of trying to find another song.  
GG: are there...not a lot of songs about hanuka??  
TT: Don't get me started.  
TT: Speaking of which, I'm late for a music meeting.  
TT: Let me know when you've got concept sketches?  
GG: okay!  


  
\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] \--  
  
GA: Okay  
GA: Are You Ready For The Planning Meeting For the Chanukah Portion Of The Production  
GA: I Think Ive Met With Everyone Else For Their Part Except You  
TT: One second.  
TT: Okay, sorry for the delay.  
TT: Wasn't Terezi going to be a part of this meeting?  
GA: She Had To Cancel  
GA: Something About Clowns Though I Assume That Was A Typo  
GA: She Did Send Me An Email With Some Preliminary Research However  
GA: Here Ill Forward It To You  
TT: Thanks.  
TT: To be honest, I'm not really sure what to do about the musical aspect for Hanukkah.  
TT: Can we agree, for the sake of argument, that we are not going to include any Adam Sandler?  
GA: I Agree Most Enthusiastically With This Point On General Principle  
TT: That's one problem solved.  
TT: The problem I keep coming back to is that there just aren't that many songs about Hanukkah.  
TT: Actually, you know what, I'm going to stop myself there.  
TT: There are plenty of good songs about Hanukkah.  
TT: But they're not that well known, and despite it being the Festival of Lights, the music always seems to get outshined by the better known Christmas songs.  
TT: So really it's just sort of a habit, or dare I say it, a tradition to complain about there not being any.  
TT: But I don't need to complain about it to you.  
TT: At least I know some Hanukkah songs. I don't know any Mawlid songs.  
GA: There Are A Number Of Songs Appropriate To The Holiday  
GA: Though Perhaps Fewer Pop Acapella Parodies  
TT: I apologize for sending you all those Maccabeats links.  
GA: They Do Seem Very Talented  
TT: You cannot hope to defeat the Maccabeats in a Jewish-filk-off. They are simply the best there are.  
TT: So, given that, we should do something else.  
TT: Ideally something that does not require rhyming anything with Hanukkah.  
GA: Hold On I Think Terezi Sent Me A Link To One That Did  
GA: Possibly The Only Non Sandler Song That Rhymed It  
GA: Here It Is  
 **\-- grimAuxiliatrix shared an audio file with you --**  
  
GA: Harmonica  
GA: It Occurs To Me That Might In Fact Be The Only Word They Could Have Rhymed It With  
TT: And now they've already used it so there are no words left for me to rhyme it with.  
TT: You see what I have to work with here.  
GA: Rose Calm Down  
GA: Its Not Even That Good Of A Rhyme  
GA: Or Musical Instrument For That Matter  
GA: Anyway Since Terezi Is Busy Perhaps We Should Use This Time To Discuss The Script Instead  
TT: Sure.  
TT: I've been having some difficulties getting the writing to go in the intended direction.  
GA: What Do You Mean  
TT: Well, my first attempt resulted in an eight-part wizardry epic.  
GA: Okay Im Not Sure We Can Perform That  
TT: Which is why I tried again and this time I wound up with a romance.  
GA: That Sounds More Workable  
TT: It was one of those situations where you didn't mean to ship the characters, and yet, somehow, you wound up with them together.  
GA: Im Still Not Seeing The Problem Here  
GA: Is This Your Way Of Telling Me You Ship Us  
TT: What? No!  
GA: Should I Be Offended  
GA: I Am So Confused  
GA: Are You Saying You Dont Like Me  
TT: Of course I like you!  
TT: You are a dear friend.  
TT: And I'm starting to get the distinct impression you are trying to rile me up.  
GA: It Has Been Known To Happen On Occasion  
TT: I'm just going to say it:  
TT: I wound up writing a romance between your character and Vriska's.  
TT: That's not going to be a problem, is it?  
GA: Let Me Get This Straight  
GA: No Wait That Was Not A Good Choice Of Words  
GA: Let Me Get This Gay  
GA: You Have Written A Romance To Star Me And Vriska Quote Has Had A Crush On Me Since The Eighth Grade Unquote Serket  
GA: How Could This Possibly Be A Problem  
TT: I could try to rewrite it.  
GA: No Actually Lets Just Go With It  
GA: No Time To Be Second Guessing The Writing Now  
GA: Vriska And I Are Both Experienced Lesbians We Can Handle This  
GA: Thespians  
GA: I Was Trying To Type Thespians  
TT: ...  
GA: I Give Up  
GA: Seriously I Am Far Too Busy Right Now To Care  
TT: Should I at least clear it with Vriska?  
GA: Yes Please Do  
GA: She Will Be Thrilled Im Sure  
GA: Okay Im Late For Class  
TT: I'll try to reschedule with Terezi too.  
GA: Thank You  


  
\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering arachnidsGrip [AG] \--  
  
TT: Good news! You're kissing Kanaya.  
AG: You're conceding defe8 in the winking war already?  
TT: No, I mean your character and Kanaya's are romantic leads in the script I've written.  
AG: Suuuuuuuure that's what you meant ::::)  
TT: Anyway, ignoring your baseless insinuations about my romantic interests in Kanaya...  
AG: 8aseful!  
TT: Would you be okay with that role?  
AG: I'll perform it with aplom8.  
TT: Terrific.  
TT: I'll send you the draft soon.  
AG: Gr8.  
AG: Does that mean you finished your Hanukah bit finally?  
TT: Soonish.  


  
\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering gallowsCalibrator [GC] \--  
  
TT: Is it just me or is literally everybody spelling Hanukkah differently?  
GC: TH1S 1S WHY 1 SP3LL 1T חנוכה  
TT: Okay, I'm pretty sure that's cheating.  
GC: JUST B3 GL4D 1 H4V3NT WORK3D OUT HOW TO 4PPLY MY TYP1NG QU1RK TO H3BR3W Y3T  
TT: I'm sure you'll figure it out eventually.  
TT: Anyway, you missed me embarrassing myself at the meeting.  
GC: D1D YOU T3LL SOM3 SORT OF 3MB4RR4SS1NG M3NO4RH-R3L4T3D 4N3CDOT3?  
TT: No.  
TT: Although my menorah is kind of embarrassing.  
GC: GO ON  
TT: I mean.  
TT: It's really tacky.  
GC: WH4T CONST1TUT3S T4CKY?  
GC: 4R3 TH3 C4NDL3S 4LL 4T D1FF3R3NT H31GHTS OR SOM3TH1NG?  
TT: No, nothing like that. It's kosher.  
GC: TH3N WH4T?  
TT: Well.  
TT: It was a gift.  
TT: You know my mom.  
GC: 4CTU4LLY 1 DONT  
TT: You figuratively know my mom.  
TT: I have complained about her before.  
GC: OH  
GC: W41T 1S 1T...4 W1Z4RD M3NOR4H?  
TT: No, thankfully, she has yet to find anything quite that bad.  
TT: It's a cat menorah.  
 **\-- tentacleTherapist shared an image file with you --**  
  
TT: Wait, shit, that's an image link.  
GC: Y34H >:[  
TT: There are little ceramic cats with tiny candleholders on their heads.  
TT: And mice along the base.  
TT: It is all hand-painted and extremely adorable.  
GC: TH4TS...4CTU4LLY PR3TTY 1NCR3D1BL3  
TT: I mean, I like it.  
TT: But I'm not going to admit that I like it.  
TT: Except in that passive-aggressive of course I'm going to thank her for the gift sort of way.  
GC: TH1S 4LL SOUNDS PO1NTL3SSLY COMPL1C4T3D  
TT: It is.  
TT: ...I just noticed that there are not one, but two cats snuggled up around the shamash candle holder in the center.  
GC: OH NO  
GC: 1TS SH1PPY  
TT: It's shippy.  
TT: So, a shippy thing was actually how I embarrassed myself earlier.  
TT: Not cat-related, I should hasten to add.  
GC: 1 W4S 4BOUT TO S4Y  
TT: I kind of wrote a romance between Kanaya and Vriska's characters.  
GC: 1V3 H34RD OF WORS3 SH1PS  
TT: It was originally between my character and Kanaya's.  
TT: Which was unintentional!  
TT: It just worked so well.  
TT: And as I wrote it I realized how desperately I wanted to play that part.  
TT: But I didn't trust those feelings, and so instead I swapped in Vriska's character for my own, since hers was the only other one I could get the logistics to work for.  
TT: Naturally I did not admit any of this to Kanaya.  
GC: WHY NOT?  
TT: I would be mortified.  
GC: YOU TWO S33M PR3TTY FL1RTY  
GC: 1 R34LLY DONT TH1NK TH1S 1S 4S B1G 4 D34L 4S YOU M4K3 1T OUT TO B3  
TT: Well, it's too late now anyway.  
GC: TO F1X TH3 SCR1PT, P3RH4PS  
GC: TO FL1RT SOM3 MOR3? PL3NTY OF T1M3  
TT: Which we're not doing!  
GC: OF COURS3 NOT >:]  


  
\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] \--  
  
GA: Are You Ready For The Department Holiday Banquet  
TT: Almost.  
TT: Thank you for inviting me, by the way.  
GA: I Had An Extra Ticket  
GA: And Thought It Would Be Nice To Spend The Evening With You  
GA: Also It Saves Me From Having To Make Awkward Polite Conversation With People I Barely Know  
TT: I am in favor of spending the evening enabling you to ignore other people in favor of me.  
GA: Careful Youre Starting To Sound Like Vriska There  
TT: I shall make a note of it for the future.  
TT: So I'm debating wearing a headscarf.  
TT: What do you think?  
GA: I Thought In Your Case That Only Mattered If You Were Married  
TT: Are you offering?  
GA: Only If It Does Not Require Additional Banquet Related Small Talk  
TT: A small ceremony, presided over by Justice of the Peace Pyrope, and punctuated by the rest of the cast spontaneously breaking into a rendition of Satisfied.  
GA: Well Just Dont Promise Them Any More Hamilton Songs Than That I Dont Want To Have To Keep Disappointing Them  
GA: Okay I Will Be At Your Door Shortly To Pick You Up  
TT: I'll be waiting!  


  
\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering gallowsCalibrator [GC] \--  
  
TT: Okay, I am definitely flirting with her.  
GC: C4LL3D 1T >:]  



	3. Chapter 3

  
\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] \--  
  
TT: I didn't think we would make it to this point, but here we are about to put on a show.  
TT: Seeing all the people in the audience waiting to watch our holiday musical...it fills me with determination.  
GA: It Fills Me With Dread  
GA: But Also I Suppose A Sense Of Grim Determination  
GA: Like We Say In The Quote Biz Unquote  
GA: The Show Must Go Wrong  
TT: Go on?  
GA: That Too  
GA: What Did You End Up Going With For The Christmas Portion By The Way  
TT: ...I thought you were handling that?  
GA: I Was Almost Certain You Were  
TT: Um.  
TT: Did we forget Christmas?  
GA: We Forgot Christmas  
GA: How On Earth Did We Get All The Way To The Night Of The Performance Without Remembering To Include Christmas  
TT: I don't know!  
GA: Is There Some Last Minute Thing We Can Do  
GA: Magi Or Santa Or Something  
TT: Shit, we forgot Santa.  
TT: Shit, let's be...wait, no, I can't be Santa.  
TT: Mom would never let me hear the end of it.  
GA: I Am Also For The Record Not Going To Be Santa  
TT: Okay, hold on, I have an idea.  
TT: I have to be on stage in a second, but while I do that, can you go and ask Jade if we can borrow Bec?  
TT: And then, in the costume prop box in the dressing room, there should be a Santa hat.  
TT: Have Jade put the hat on Bec and wait in the wings for my signal.  
GA: Okay  
GA: Before I Do Though Just To Be Clear  
GA: Are You Absolutely Certain The Christians In The Audience Wont Be Offended By Us Putting A Santa Hat On The Dog  
TT: It worked for Charles Schultz.  


  
\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering gallowsCalibrator [GC] \--  
  
TT: I am so very glad to be off the stage for a bit.  
TT: I think the Hanukkah portion just now went really well!  
GC: 4ND 1T ONLY TOOK 4 FULL W33K OF SQU4BBL1NG OV3R R3V1S1ONS!  
TT: Yes, but it was totally worth it in the end.  
TT: You know, we got so caught up in the details we almost forgot the true meaning of Hanukkah.  
GC: DONUTS!  
TT: I was going to say being stubborn and having arguments.  
GC: 1 D1S4GR33  
TT: It's a Hanukkah miracle!  
GC: NO 1 M34N TH4TS MOR3 OF 4 G3N3R4L J3W1SH TR4D1T1ON 4ND NOT ON3 P4RT1CUL4R TO חנוכה.  
TT: I actually agree with you on that point, so I'm sure you can understand why it is so important that I instead disagree.  
TT: It's the principle of the thing.  
GC: 1 4M GO1NG TO THROW 4N 3NT1R3 D3CK OF PL4Y1NG C4RDS 4T YOU  
TT: Where did you get those, anyway?  
GC: TH3R3S 4 WHOL3 CR4T3 FULL OF TH3M B4CKST4G3 FROM "SUMM3R OF STOPP4RD"  
TT: Shouldn't that be coins?  
GC: 1 L1K3 YOUR 4NNOY1NG F4C3 TOO MUCH TO THROW 4 H34VY B4G OF CO1NS 4T 1T >:P  
TT: Aw. Not even gelt?  
GC: YOUD H4V3 TO W1N SOM3 F1RST  
GC: HOLD ON VR1SK4 1S 4SK1NG M3 SOM3TH1NG  


  
\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] \--  
  
GA: Okay Have You Seen Vriska  
GA: My Scene With Her Is Coming Up Soon And I Cant Find Her Anywhere  
TT: I think Terezi talked to her last.  
GA: Okay Im Walking Over To The Sound Board Now  
GA: And No One Is There Great  


  
\-- gardenGnostic [GG] opened memo on board Whatd I Miss --  
  
GG: hey everyone im in the dressing room and vriska and terezi need medical attention!!!  
GG: they both keep telling me theyre fine but terezi is bleeding and im pretty sure vriska has a broken arm!  
AG: thts 8cause i am fiune  
AG: shot ow  
GG: you were shot???  
GA: No Dueling  
AG: no 8m try8ng to typs shit  
AG: and my typng is 8lso shit  
AG: my 8rm is pro8a8ly 8rken i gueeeeeeees  
AG: ow  
GG: how did you break your arm anyway?  
AG: the most fa8ulos of stunts  
AG: an 8cro88ic f8ck8ng piour8 of the high8st cali8re  
GC: L13S  
GC: GR13V4NC3S W3R3 41R3D  
GA: I Am Almost Certain I Said No Dueling  
GC: >:[  
AG: i would wink 8ut it hurts too much to hit shift  
TT: Aradia's scene is almost up. Kanaya, can you go announce a brief intermission?  
TT: I'm going to call campus medical. Jade, there should be a first aid kit there in the dressing room.  
GG: its full of silk scarves :o  
TT: Okay, I suspect if you go look in the prop box, you will find the actual first aid kit which was mistakenly swapped for that one.  
GC: WH4T SHOULD 1 B3 DO1NG  
TT: I don't know, fly casual.  


  
\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] \--  
  
GA: Okay Ive Bought Us Some Time  
GA: How Is Everyone  
TT: Getting medical attention, mostly.  
TT: But I don't think Vriska's going to be able to handle anything more than a curtain call.  
TT: We were so close.  
GA: Honestly This Was To Be Expected  
TT: Because of long-standing rivalries?  
GA: No  
GA: Remember What I Said Earlier  
GA: Blood Love And Rhetoric  
GA: This Performance Had Love And Rhetoric Already  
GA: We Could Have Done Blood And Love Without The Rhetoric  
GA: Or Blood And Rhetoric Without The Love  
GA: Or All Three Concurrent Or Consecutive  
GA: But We Couldnt Have Done Love And Rhetoric Without The Blood  
GA: Blood Is Compulsory  
GA: Theyre All Blood You See  
TT: Well, we're not doing so great on the love front either, if Vriska can't do her big scene where her character and yours confess their love for each other.  
GA: Ah Yes  
GA: The Kissing Bits  
TT: I'm not sure I can write it out of the scene on the fly.  
GA: Could We Cast Someone Else  
GA: And Lampshade The Different Appearance  
GA: We Could Just Say A Wizard Did It  
TT: Vriska's out, Terezi's out, Jade and Aradia are in that scene already, and you can't kiss yourself.  
GA: I Cant Help But Notice You Forgot Someone Not On That List  
TT: I'm not sure I follow you.  
GA: Well Um  
GA: I Mean  
GA: You Could Kiss Me  
TT: Oh!  
TT: I...  
TT: I could do that.  
TT: It's not like we've rehearsed or anything.  
TT: Not that I'm saying we need to kiss right now.  
TT: You know, I'm just going to stop talking about this.  
GA: No Please Keep Talking  
GA: Its Much More Convenient For You To Talk Shyly About Us Kissing  
GA: Because That Way I Dont Have To  
GA: Which Is Not To Say That I Dont Appreciate The Subject  
GA: But It Is An Awkward One  
GA: And If Youre In Charge Of The Awkwardness For Once  
GA: I Could Be In Charge Of Sitting Over Here Serenely And Objectively And As If We Dont Have Mutual Unannounced Crushes On Each Other  
GA: And Instead I Could Say Things Like  
GA: Of Course You Will Be Fine  
GA: You Know All The Lines  
TT: To which I could say, in response: Of course! I wrote them.  
TT: But perhaps I wouldn't go into detail about how I wrote them thinking about us.  
GA: That Would Be A Very Silly Detail To Add  
GA: So Are We Good With This  
TT: With us playing romantic leads?  
GA: With Us Kissing  
TT: I have but one request.  
GA: Name It And I Will Do My Best To Grant It  
TT: I really like you, and I don't want our first kiss to be shared under any other names than our own.  
GA: We Have A Little Bit Of Time  
GA: Shall I Come Over There And We Can Address That Now Then  
TT: I would rather like that, I think.  
GA: Just A Minute  
TT: I'm nervous.  
GA: Don't Be  
GA: You'll Do Fine  


**Author's Note:**

> This fic is mostly about Hanukkah but it mentions other holidays as well. I personally celebrate Hanukkah, Christmas, and the solstice, but the rest of the holidays in this fic are not mine, and if I misrepresented them somehow, I am deeply sorry. Happy belated holidays!


End file.
